Work Trip

I am on my way to a 2 day meeting which is going to take me away from my family for 3 days and 2 nights. We got home last night, unpacked the car, fed the girls, and got them to bed. I was so tired that instead of packing for my trip I went to bed too. So in the middle of the night at that feeding I am trying to get together some of the items that I need to take. I ended up being late today because I left my packing to the last minute. I have been dreading this meeting since I found out about it. I know that in my life I am going to have many times where I need to leave my family to go to different things, but leaving behind my two infant daughters was so hard. I left them with one sleeping in the crib all warm and calm, and the other one having kangaroo care with Da. I so wanted to crawl back in bed and snuggle too. Plus I just can’t stand knowing that I will not be able to hold them or snuggle them, or be there to soothe them when they are crying. Plus I hate leaving Ben to handle all of it by himself all night and day.
Then there is the matter of pumping. These meetings are rough, and we hardly get breaks, have lunch brought in and work through lunch, so I am going to have to walk out of this meeting every three hours to pump for 20 minutes, and then have to store the bottles or bags in a fridge probably at the office; which is uncomfortable. I had to pump in a car on my way here because it is a 4 hour drive with my Boss in the front seat, and a fellow store manager in the other front seat. That was uncomfortable too.
I suppose I just have to keep saying that having a good job is worth all of this in these trying times. I have so many blessings. I need to keep reminding myself of all of this when I want to tear up thinking about how much I miss my family and how hard it is to find a way to pump.